I am is the most important energy in the life of a human being. This is because everything is about us. Humans always think in terms of I am. “I am happy. I am sad. I am angry. I am compassionate.”
I am consists of two parts: the Great and the little. Great Self, True Self, Higher Self is the I am with a period. For little self, personality self, incarnate self the words I am is the beginning of a sentence. Humans explain our actions, our thoughts, and our intentions through the words I am.
Spirituality, we are informed, is to arrive at the totality of the Great I am. Imagine a circle. This circle is Divine Spirit, the All Is One energy. It encompasses the infinite potential of all that has been and all that will be, or might be.
However, as duality arises from mind the circle begins to be crossed by lines. We do this in religion as we divide the great circle into conceptual pictures. The lines could be expressed as- Father, Son, and Holy Spirit; Divine Mother, Father, and Weaver; Earth, Sky, and Spirits. There are numerous ways the circle becomes a picture. And then the picture becomes the path, the way, the truth. We can’t help thinking and attempting to understand but we start making trouble when our picture becomes The Picture.
As humans we are always busy trying to understand ourselves, others, and the universe. As spirits we discover the Great Circle that is the I am; the Divine Avatar connection, Buddha Self, Christ Consciousness Self, True Self, Higher Self, etc. Then, because we are physical beings, we begin to define ourselves. We have spent lifetimes creating patterns and habits of thinking and acting that are lines in the circle of our Great I am. After a while, we have a very complex picture within the Great Circle of Life.
Most of us assume that the path of spirit is about changing ourselves to fit into the “spiritual” role defined by whatever set of teachings we are engaged in. Sometimes it’s about finding the right path so we can be saved, healed, or magicked into a perfect being. We have forgotten the Great I am and focus only on the messy lines we have scribbled within the circle.
To bring our attention back to the wholeness of our circle it’s necessary to accept all the lines within the circle, even the scribbles. Everyone has things we don’t like about ourselves. But, we are the artist who drew the picture. Some of it we created as a child. Part was created by a scared or angry adolescent. Other parts seemed to be there when we were born. What if we simply redraw the lines, or add new ones, so all the parts fit together into a mandala of beauty?
The place to start with our Great I am mandala is to stop thinking we are broken. It helps to focus on how we already are loving, generous, kind, and compassionate. Sometimes we will discover that we are harder than we thought; softer than we thought, more fragile than we thought, smaller or bigger than we thought. Those are just lines in the Great I am Circle. We can learn to say, “I am that.”
Once we add lines or restructure lines within the Great Circle we have wholeness. We will have structural, spiritual, moral, and ethical integrity. What if we paint the mandala of our life in all the colors of creation? Maybe we will end up being who we were always meant to be.